Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Nov 28th will never be my favorite day. Ever.

Today marks the 6 year anniversary of my Mom's death. It has been a totally terrible day. I slept terribly last night thinking about her, cried myself to sleep in the middle of the night....cried all morning, and in the bathroom at work a few times. Our son saw me crying this morning and he got upset too. Which made me feel guilty on top of my grief.

I don't even want to face anyone today, although not one single person has asked me how I was doing or even knows what a difficult day it has been for me (except my sweet husband), and I'm grateful for that!

After hiding my crazy out of control emotions at work all day, I'm not going to practice tonight. I can't face people.I am going home to snuggle with my sweet little boy (who informed me this morning that I could still talk to my Mom...I just had to make sure to look up to Heaven when I did it so she would hear me.) Then I'm going to crawl in bed, pull the covers over my head and probably cry myself to sleep....and wake up in the morning knowing I've survived another year without my Mom and nothing has changed. It still sucks. :(


BeckyMc said...

I understand. My mom has been gone over 20 years and I still feel cheated everytime we have a special occasion and she's not there. But your little boy is right. Talk to her, and take time to feel her love for you. That will help. Love doesn't die.